30 things I love right now.

1. The 9 month old I spend 3 days a week with who examines everything in love. 2. movement. 3. green bodum french press. 4. yoga beast- the blog. hilarious. 5. my saturday sisters. 6. dessert for dinner. 7. the return of kitchen crashing and cake baking. 8. my new sanctuary. 9. yellow walls in grey cities. 10. biscuits with eggs cheddar and jam. 11. human-ness getting bigger. 12. slow. yoga. 13. frozen pjs burritos. 14. peonies smelling like heaven. 15. the leaf. the prius. gas efficiency brilliance. 16. Philip Philips! 17. vit. D-3  in any form. 18. spring getting rids. 19. my own bathroom. not sharing. 20. dog dreams. 21. baby dreams. 22. decaf cafe au laits. 23. watermelons. 24. their abundance as inspiration. 25. inner voice- deeeeeep listening under difficult circumstances. 26. pnw kindness in new seasons but really everywhere here. 27. lush green garden houses. 28. responding instead of reacting. 29. hawaii as a music genre. 30. worry? why? what’s next? don’t tell me.. I want to be surprised.

Inspired by the savvy TJ @

space

I fell in love once with a boy who spoke in signs. I spent that summer chasing howler monkeys and living what I believe deep down in the tissues under my bones  to be the good life. I smelled the air and breathed the water and was present without needing a box of tools to get me there. I was young and desperate for a shaking and that summer changed my life (as summers tend to do.) But as life goes I had to move on once the summer ended.

Today I need wide open space to remind me of how good it gets. It’s hard to find myself  in the hustle and the crowds I get methodical and brainy. I need to take myself out of my bubbled world and into the expansion. Where I  find again equal inhales and exhales as my life sinks. I understand why people live in the country and the city. The city to hustle and the country to breath … I am reminded of space and time & how much there is of everything. I’ve driven across country twice it was second to falling in love the happiest of times; camping and playing in the redwoods. My nose helps me to get there and once there I can be quiet for once amongst the trees.

This past season of rain sparked some loneliness and separation.  All of a sudden some sunny days are taken over by friends that tuck me under their arms and share their lives with me. Friends I haven’t known my whole life but it doesn’t seem to matters because they know me now. It has taken me a while to let go of my grip. It has taken me a while to make space for this.

It’s hard for me to let go of things in fear that once I let it go there will be nothing but empty space. Truth is that space is vital and must be made. That space is where the magic happens it comes to mix us up for whatever is next. But we must let go. I’ve had to let go of tropical summers, of places I called home, of  furniture and friends all in order to make new space . These things I let go of I keep inside me safe to remind me of endless possibility as their memories arise in instants. They say to me; remember this ? how good it can be? and they remind me that the empty space is never a bad thing; it is simply a waiting room for the spirit to rest until it is ready for flight again.

babies

I have more excuses for my lack in the artsy dept.

I’m busy with a baby (not mine don’t worry.) Yogic breathing and sequences. Plus I’m unhappy with the state of the kitchen in which I currently reside. My butt is bigger than it was last summer and I read somewhere cake won’t help that. So that’s my excuse for not baking.

A truth is; I do not have that need so much to bake. There was a period of time that I had to. I think mostly because I was really hungry. I am not as hungry anymore; I tend to feed myself better. I still crave/love/indulge/believe in cake. I read this quote once that said nothing feels better than skinny and I sort of agree but I also think that nothing feels worse than hunger. Ah! to be women in this day and age with a body! Learning to love it no matter what. There’s a lifetime project..

Back to the baby. The one who chews everything and anything. He prefers pens and remote controls to expensive toys. He sobs one minute and laughs hysterically the next. We go for really long walks with our leg warmers on.

It’s a hard knock life eating watermelon frozen yogurt and taking strolls through the city of hipsters. We fit right in here chewing on our spoons. When we feel sad we tickle each other until the sadness passes and it always passes.